


I Could Give A Thousand Reasons

by Ourania



Category: Mass Effect, Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-03
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-14 07:17:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10531578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ourania/pseuds/Ourania
Summary: Love can be a fickle thing and it doesn’t always show in the ways we want it to. Four times Ryder almost said ‘I love you’ to Peebee and the one time she didn’t have to.





	1. Firstly Unaware

**Author's Note:**

> So I absolutely adored Peebee's romance in the game and got the sudden urge to write some fluff. This is the result, enjoy!

This first time it happens, Aderyn is flawlessly unaware.

She watches as Peebee muses away, thoughts flying faster than her mind can grasp hold of them. She paces the entirety of her workspace with a few short steps and makes a sharp turn as she resumes the thought process.

Aderyn adjusts her position until her chin is resting on the top of her knee. The crate she is sitting on isn’t comfortable, but it works. There isn’t any true seating in the area connected to the escape pod, just an expandable worktable and several crates packed into the corners as extra storage, though what it stores, Peebee never says. But she doesn’t mind, it offers her a small glimpse into the expanse that is the asari’s mind.

Her eyes focus on the rapid movements of Peebee’s hands, picking up random pieces of remtech, and turning them over as she explains a thought associated with them. The words don’t stick in Aderyn’s mind, exhaustion hazing her concentration.

She smiles, something soft but strained, and hopes it can be enough to satisfy Peebee. It works, and the asari offers a grin full of teeth and excitement.

Peebee never asks her for more than she can give. She lets Aderyn enter her space and simply _listen._ It is all that is required and it is such a refreshment from the constant stares and expectations from the rest of the crew. They all expect her to fill her role as well as her father. She is not him, and doesn’t want to be. The man did enough to screw over her life, even after death.

But Peebee? Her fascination with the role of Pathfinder faded quickly in favour of learning about the person behind the title. Aderyn lets her eyes trail of Peebee’s hands, taking apart of a broken piece and inspecting it. There is a gentleness in her approach; each part is taken out with precision, never discarded, always respected.

Aderyn finds her gaze set on Peebee’s face, eyes deep and full of spark. It draws her in further and Aderyn loses focus on all else. Everything about her seems purposely misplaced, the mismatched nature of her clothing, the mesh of dots over her face, and the streak of paint drawn over eyes; she made herself interesting in the most unorthodox manners. Aderyn wants to learn more, learn _why._

“So, what do you think?” Peebee’s voices filters through the haze, quiet but quick. She can draw in all attention with her words.

Aderyn closes her eyes, a sigh ready to escape. “I love...it.”

But there is something else to love.


	2. Secondly Startled

The second time, Aderyn begins to find an inkling of what her feelings might be.

Aderyn’s hand moves without purpose, guiding the pencil over the same marks and scratches on the paper. The hatching pattern creates more distinction in the shapes. It breaks them apart, making the mountain sharper and cast a grand shadow over the sandy hill. Her focus is intense, unbreakable—

“Hey, that’s looking pretty nice!”

—and easily startled.

A face of blue and purple flashes into Aderyn’s view, making her let out an uncharacteristically loud shriek. She jerks to the side and falls off the edge of the couch. Her arms hit the floor first, keeping her face from further harm. But metal is hard and she will have bruises. She takes most of the items with her, pencils dropping on the floor, pillows hitting the table, and the blankets tangle up in her limbs. Only her sketchbook comes out unscathed, but in that moment, Aderyn can’t find it.

“Huh, you’re pretty easy to scare. Should remember that for next time.” Peebee steps back into view, now standing over the fallen form of Aderyn, sketchbook in hand. Her other hand rests on her hip, pushing it out with just enough personality.

“Peebee!” Aderyn groans. She covers her face with her hands, cheeks flushing red quicker than her mind can process. The moment was embarrassing enough, she didn’t need her there to add to it.

The sound of pages flipping overtakes her attention. Aderyn peeks through her fingers and catches the asari checking out the different images drawn in the book. _Oh no._ The redness deepens from a pale shade and leaps straight to tomato. Aderyn struggles to free herself from the blankets and pillows, but she shoves them aside with enough force, and scrambles to her feet. She nearly falls, but grabs the edge of the couch, and stands back up.

“Nice, interesting angle, boring, intense, oh we just visited there.” Peebee lists her thoughts as she passes each image. She is halfway through when Aderyn tears the book from her grip. “Uh, hey!”

“‘Uh, hey’ yourself! You can’t just...just! Ugh!” Aderyn huffs and wraps her arms over the book protectively.

Peebe raises a brow, the black ink streak making the illusion of an eyebrow. She doesn’t say anything, both hands now resting on her hips. The side of her hip is still pushed out with all the attitude Peebee is. She is always visible in the little things; a wave of the hand, point of a finger, pushing of a hip. Every movement has a purpose to convey. She waits, and Aderyn feels the emotion pass, calming in a few short breaths.

“Better now?” Peebee waves a hand towards her. Aderyn nods. “Good, now draw me.”

“I—what?” Aderyn is genuinely confused, a first for her.

“Draw me. I saw your sketches, you’ve got a good eye for scenery. Wanna see if you have the same for people. Could use it for a future project. I won’t talk, promise.”

Aderyn blinks, slow, and lets the words settle in her mind. Peebee wants Aderyn to draw a picture of her. She wants a picture _drawn_ by her. It doesn’t seem to compute. But Peebee makes her way over to the couch and picks a position, and she holds it. She is lounging on the couch, one arm draped over the top and her legs crossing over the other, keeping unbent. She’s serious; Peebee is rarely ever that way.

“Um, uh, sure?” Aderyn gathers a few items from the floor and shuffles over to the seat she had been on. Peebee shifts to face her. Aderyn opens to a fresh page, pencil hovering in the air. She studies the asari’s features, and begins to find a point to start with; her eyes seem acceptable.

Bright eyes, a strangely calming shade of green stare back at her. It doesn’t seem to suite Peebee. So much of her is made to be noticeable, loud and present. But her eyes, while sparking with life, seem to be placid when inspected further. It doesn’t match, serene green and striking blue. Peebee is a walking contradiction even in appearance. But it only draws Aderyn’s focus in further.

She leans forward, book pressing against the flat portion of her knees. She wants to know what makes her eyes so. Olive green dances in the low light produced by the ship. Aderyn holds in her breath. Anticipation is waiting, for something to show. Peebee isn’t aware. For all that she claims to catch hold of, her mind is more of a distraction than an asset in some situations. The asari sets her gaze on the distant stars.

Aderyn taps the tip of the pencil down. She catches it in the reflection of Peebee’s face on the window. Her smile, wide as it is, holds back. She misses something. Her eyes hold longing, for more, for less. Aderyn wants to know it all.

The pencil moves on its own accord, guided by Aderyn’s vision. She flickers between the page and model. Peebee catches her lingering and smirks. It makes her flush and she focuses back on her scribbling. A word is written into the edge of the page: love. Aderyn is quick to erase it.

SAM speaks somewhere in the back of her mind. _“I am detecting increased levels of dopamine Pathfinder.”_

Aderyn lets herself smile. Maybe there’s more to this than she thinks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for the lovely comments! I'm really glad others are enjoying this. There can never be enough fluff and romantic slice of life moments I say. Hopefully I'll have the next chapter up by tomorrow.


	3. Thirdly Surprised

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just putting a quick warning here the chapter does contain brief mentions of an anxiety attack.

The third time it occurs catches Aderyn by surprise.

A heavy smell of sulfur holds in the air and makes it unbearable to breathe. Aderyn prefers to keep to the Nomad instead of walking when exploring new planets, but some areas cannot be reached unless on foot. The sun beats down with an intensity that rivals the sulfur.

“It should be close,” Aderyn says to the pair behind her. Her eyes follow the map constructed by her omi-tool. Random dots flicker on the holoscreen, an indication they are close to something.

Aderyn isn’t quite sure how anything can survive in this environment, but her job is to make it hospitable. She holds back a bitter laugh. The job was never hers to begin with, just something tossed on her in a moment when she lacked control, when _he_ held all the power. It has been some time but the anger still lingers in her core.

“Where is this base supposed to be located again?” Cora asks and her irritation seems to seep through. Kandara is a planet she would rather keep away from, Aderyn has come to find in their short time in the land of exiles. The people are strained, but not as bad as half of the Nexus makes them out to be. They generally have no cares and Aderyn feels oddly at ease in their presence. There is less stress on her to keep up social interactions. There are three tried and true methods of communication in Kadara: drinking, shooting and fighting. None require intricate word work or pressure to keep the conversation going. However, outside of the makeshift town is another thing entirely. If it had been earlier, Aderyn would have ignored Cora's annoyance, but right now she was more than inclined to agree.

Peebee walks with lack of notice or care. Her eyes catch sight of the monolith in the distance and she is content. “Somewhere, nowhere,” her words bounce about like a song and it makes Aderyn smile, if small.

Cora shakes her head. “Right, so helpful. Ryder?”

Aderyn winces at the referral by surname, but her helmet hides the expression. She glances at the soldier with a shrug. “We should be close…”

There is a moment of silence as Aderyn’s words trail off. Cora is unimpressed, but she doesn’t show it, never does. She has some respect for her, enough to hide her views, but never with the same grace she applies to battle. Gil calls it a bad poker face, and Aderyn agrees with that.

The trio continue to move in an aimless direction, following the directions of a wayward outlaw, but they don’t even know how accurate they are. The sun pushes down more. It isn’t like the heat on Elaadan, still, it comes close to it. Aderyn couldn’t breathe on that planet.

_Ratatatata!_ A burst of noise erupts in the distance, bullets and explosions in equal measure. Cora’s head jerks up, Peebee stops mid-stride, and Aderyn holds her breath. Smoke is visible in the distance and the three share an expression of understanding. Their pace quickens as they head towards the danger.

Aderyn’s feet ache, hitting the ground while she runs. Urgency directs her movements now, personal control pushed aside for the time. But something isn’t right. She feels her chest constricting as they sprint further. The conditions don’t mix well with her. She thought she had overcome it, but the anxiety still is there, holding on somewhere in the back of her mind.

Aderyn takes in a breath, counts, and lets it out. The tension remains.

Her eyes glance at Cora, now taking the lead as she follows the same marker on her own map. It helps to focus on something, give her mind a distant distraction. The words are there resting on her tongue, waiting to ask for a break, but her chest grows tighter. Cora knows combat, but she couldn’t help, not in this.

Another breath is taken and this time, it is accompanied by a hand. Aderyn nearly leaps with her biotics, only stalled by the hand holding her own, and the other gripping her shoulder, grounding her.

“What…?” Her eyes search for the source and a purple jacket, always open right at the navel, is what she finds first. Peebee’s grip gets stronger and she meets Aderyn at eye level.

“Just focus on me, ‘kay? No need to sweat out the little details,” she speaks with a carefree air, but Aderyn can sense she is taking the moment seriously. She lets herself focus on the asari. Everything falls into the distance, only the feeling of another person there to guide her.

They move, somewhere, and the panic pushes at Aderyn’s mind. It pulls at every part of her, making the world shrink and collapse around her. It's too close, too tight. Her lungs crave air but she can't take in enough to settle them. Hands shake, shivering from the reaction her body pushes against her. Her eyes shut and her body tightens with each raspy gulp of air. She’s had moments like these before, when her body cannot cope with the stressors involved in combat and shuts down on her. She wasn’t given the proper training to handle it, to be something she wasn’t. But in some strange way, Peebee knows how to help. Maybe it was just giving her support to help to calm the symptoms. Who can say?

Peebee’s voice filters through the panic, soft, but strong. “We’re almost there. Just take down a bunch of nobodies and we can hide in the pod after.”

It's what pulls her back into some semblance of reality. The rest is hazy, glossed over with sounds of firing weapons and shouting. But it brings her senses back into working condition. The panic pricks now, less relevant, but present in fewer ways as the seconds tick. A fight passes them, but it doesn't affect them. They have a space created between them.

Aderyn laughs, hard and heavy, like her chest will explode from the effort. She is trying too much but it eases her mind. Peebee chuckles beside her. “Better?”

Her hand holds in place, not leaving Aderyn’s. Aderyn gives a shaky nod. “I needed some lov— _luck!_ I needed some l-luck.” A cough helps to cover the slip up, but Peebee doesn’t catch it. She smiles, pulling her hand back in favour of a gun.

“Mmm, good! Now let’s be done with this.” Peebe nods and dashes off. Aderyn realizes they are in the middle of a battlefield. Her hands lift, and she can feel the warmness clinging to it. The lack of Peebee’s hand is discomforting.  


	4. Fourthly Conscious

The fourth time makes Aderyn begin to think it is no longer a simple set of mistakes.

The screen before Aderyn blinks at a few random intervals that prompt her attention. There are new messages, emails, and other forms of correspondents that all deem necessary for her to read. But the hour is late, and her eyes strain from continually reading over reports. A Pathfinder is not only meant to seek and prepare planets for habitation it seems. Other duties include but not limited to: assisting worldly inhabitants, outfitting the crew with gear, reporting to the higher ups and reading reports from crew members that need full approval before being sent.

Aderyn is certain her father made up half of these extra duties to screw with her from the afterlife. Somehow, her thoughts always circle back to him. The man did nothing but make her childhood a nightmare, controlling every aspect of her freedom, and forcing her into a job she never wanted. He’s gone but she still clings to the resentment.

She sighs, rubbing at her eyes. Her other hand taps at the keyboard and forces the screen to close, taking with it all the unneeded messages. She will deal with them in the morning.

SAM speaks in her ear, a whisper only for her, about some requests that need approval. Aderyn gives a noncommittal grunt and hopes it will satisfy the AI. The presence leaves wishing her a good night.

It leaves her with a small smile. As awful as her father was, SAM was one of the few decent things he left behind. She wouldn’t exist without SAM and liked having him around. It gives her a sense of stability with Finn still resting back in the Nexus.

Aderyn makes her way into the kitchen as the door slides open. Her hands search around the cupboards for coffee and a cup. Finn would be reprimanding her for drinking so late. But her twin wasn’t here, and she had to find a way to handle things on her own.

A mug is found, though not the usual one that Aderyn uses. It is tall and made of some metallic material she can’t place given the late hour. The top half is painted red but the bottom remains silver. The Andromeda Initiative logo is stamped on the side meaning it isn’t a specialized cup, it belongs to the set provided by the program. The cup is either Suvi’s or Kallo’s. Neither drink often, but when they do, it would be with a mug like that, everyone else has personalized ones.

Aderyn takes it and shoves it into the coffeemaker without further thinking. They can bother her about it in the morning. Everything is left for the morning.

The drink takes a while, slow drips of water filtering through and mixing with the blend. It’s the strongest stuff that she could find. Aderyn can never sleep without a straight shot of caffeine. It’s a bad habit, she recognizes, formed from the years she spent in med school. Her eyes pass over the rest of the room without much purpose until the drink finishes.

She takes the handle and pulls it out from the machine. A heavy steam raises up from the mug, stirring in the air. She can smell the strength of the brew, powerful and potent, just what she needs.

Her feet guide her out of the kitchen and towards the main bridge. The ship is on autopilot with most of the crew resting in their quarters or in some space on the ship. Aderyn has never bothered to inspect that.

She passes the round table and heads up the ramp until she is on the upper deck. The video conference is turned off until the ship becomes fully powered for the day’s events. Most nonessentials are powered down or left running on low energy.

Aderyn holds the mug up to her lips. She takes a short sip, the flavour burning her tongue with heat. Her lips pull back in a bitter expression. It would be wiser to wait.

A gentle hum drags her over towards the circular couches and she means to sit, but a short and strangling noise startles her. The mug titters in her hands, but she recovers before spilling. “What the hell…?”

Her eyes set on the couch, now aware of a lumpy form curled up against a pillow. The person’s back faces her but she can tell by the shape it is Peebee. Her usual coat is absent and all that remains is a black tank with baggy grey pants, and bare feet. Peebee's toes wiggle as if knowing a pair of eyes are staring at them. Aderyn sets her coffee down on the table.

She stares at the pants which suspiciously resemble a pair of hers that went missing. Knowing the asari, she could and would walk into her room without asking to borrow clothes and forget to return them. Aderyn runs a hand over her face. One more thing for the morning. The list is growing longer than she has the ability to handle.

“Mmrphhh.” A noise escapes from the pillow pressed against Peebee’s face and Aderyn can see another snore forming.

She pulls away from the table, steps breaching the distance in seconds. Her hands reach out towards Peebee. The pass over her body, shadows deepening over Peebee's face. Aderyn pulls at the corner of the pillow, careful enough, only lifting it away from the asari's mouth. She can see her face scrunch up, lips pushing upwards and her nose giving the illusion of shrinking as it follows the motion, but the expression settles once the pillow is returned beneath her head. As much as Peebee complains that Jaal can sleep through a blizzard, Peebee herself is guilty of the same when the conditions are right. Aderyn would have jerked away at the motion.

Aderyn cannot understand how she can sleep anywhere. If she were to try napping on a chair, her neck would become stiff and her body sore. But Peebee is adaptive; it’s in her habit, or genetics, or some part of her.

She remains there, kneeling against the couch. Peebee is restless in her slumber, tossing a few times and turning until her face is in line with Aderyn’s. It matches her need to be in constant motion. Stillness is not an aspect representative of Peebee. Aderyn studies her face. It’s rare to see Peebee without the black streak across her face. Her face seems more relaxed without it, not needing to play the role she chooses to be. There is less strain, more ease. The black streak would hide that with a playful curiosity.

Aderyn finds her hand lifting up and moving towards Peebee’s face. Her thumb rubs over a missed black smudge. Her skin is soft to touch, it pleases Aderyn to know that for some odd reason. She continues to rub over the spot. Peebee doesn’t react to it, snoring away.

She wants to be sleeping beside her, sharing in the warmth. It would be easy enough. Her arms could slip through the gaps, taking holding of the sleeping form, nestling into a corner of comfort. Something clicks in Aderyn’s mind and her face flushes. How long has this hopeless crush been going? It seemed past the initial stages, and was erupting into something meaningful. Her thoughts take hold and control her. She moves her hand away from Peebee’s face and replaces the empty space with a brief kiss.

“Love you,” Aderyn whispers, her forehead pressing against Peebee’s cheek. Her voice is too soft for even SAM to catch. She won’t say the words out in the open beyond this space. She can’t do that to a spirit that hates to be tethered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost at the end. One more chapter to go! I had a lot of fun doing this chapter, so I hope you enjoyed it!


	5. Fifthly Said

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are at the end! Sorry for the wait, been busy with school but I did make sure to make this chapter longer to compensate for the wait. Hope you enjoy it and thanks for reading! Expect more writing with these dorks in the future.

Aderyn enters her bedroom, the doors clicking open without prompting. In one hand, she carries a datapad full of reports that need to be filed, and in the other, a mug full of coffee to give her the energy to finish the required work. With more outposts comes more tedious work. She’s lost track of what duties are hers and what she can pawn off on others. The crew would be willing to help, she knows it, but the work is the only thing completely in her control. Everything else is by necessity.

Her feet move towards her bed, eyes never moving from the pad. The tip of her boot hits something hard and metallic. The sheer size is enough to interrupt her. Aderyn is unable to stop herself from falling.

The coffee mug soars through the air, banging against floor a few feet away. Dark liquid splatters on the tiles that will have to be cleaned later. Aderyn finds her face meeting the floor first, and the rest of her body follows. The datapad is the only thing undamaged as she dropped it before the artificial gravity forced her down.

“Ahhhh, shit!” Aderyn’s hands reached for her forehead on instinct. The first step she was taught was to check for a pulse, but given she is conscious and coherent, injury is the next important step. Her fingers push against a few areas, searching for cuts or bleeding, but there is nothing but a mild ache. She sighs with some relief. But a secondary inspection from Lexi would be best. Aderyn can't catch everything with her own hands, sometimes an additional set is needed.

It takes Aderyn a few attempts, but she is able to arrange herself into a sitting position. And once she does, she notices the object that tripped her, was a deactivated Remnant bot, Zap to be specific. Her eyebrows lower in confusion. Zap stayed in the cargo bay for safety purposes. It has a bad habit of discharging excess electricity when not involved in combat. How did it end up in her quarters of all places and turned off?

Aderyn stretches her hand out, hesitating. The robot is a beloved companion on the battlefield, but outside of it? Well, there is a reason Zap remains powered down while Poc keeps to Peebee’s workspace. Her index finger taps the top of the bot. Nothing happens. Aderyn scowls and repeats the effort, poking at other areas on the robot.

Finally, something reacts and the bot gives off a loud beeping noise. Aderyn’s hand jerks back and out of range from potential harm. “Okay, what the hell is this…?”

Zap blinks with colour, running through the awakening cycle until it glows a pale white. Aderyn watches with further confusion. It doesn’t seem to be fully active, more likely running on low power. She pushes off the ground and stands up.

“Uh, SAM? What’s Zap doing in my room?” Aderyn says with a loud tone, eyes scanning the ceiling for some response. The mechanized voice speaks in her ears, a low buzz emitting. _“It appears to have been left behind by Peebee according to door scan records.”_

“Right, of course, _Peebee._ ” Aderyn sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose. If this was some prank, Peebee needed to work on her execution.

Her finger stretch out across her face, sliding down until her chin is covered. She can’t understand why the asari would drop off an inactive drone in her room. Peebee has full run of the ship, able to travel where she pleases, and entering rooms without requesting permission from others. Lately her favourite space was Aderyn’s room, though that might be because Peebee’s current room was boiling in lava back on that other planet.

Zap hovers in the air, meeting Aderyn’s level. It keeps to the same motion and does not move further. Aderyn waits for it to respond to her. Nothing comes. She lifts her arm and activate her scanner, hoping it will do something, as the silence is unpreferable. The robot’s schematics display on screen but a loud whirring sound makes Aderyn jerk back.

The drone flashes, once, twice, and a voice crackles from its soundbox. _“Testing, testing. Is this thing even on?”_

“Hey, um, SAM? What is Zap doing now?”

_“Playing an audio recording, Pathfinder.”_

“Riiiight,” Aderyn trails off, turning off the scanner in fear of being shocked. She waits. A long pause is drawn out from the recording, sounds of tools clinking and footsteps taking over. It is only after a few minutes when the voice speaks again, louder and clear.

_“Okay, yeah, so this is on. So, hey Ryder! Wait no, she hates being called that. Ahem, hey Aderyn! So surprised to find Zap in your room? Don’t worry, I turned off the power; no fear of zapping. Anyways, I’ve noticed you seem more stressed than usual. Maybe a game will help fix that? I’ve left a few clues around, so find them all and you’ll get an extra special prize from me. First clue should be somewhere near your favourite drink. Peebee out!”_

Zap flashes again, the whirring noises dying down, and the lights fade away until it turns off. The bot thumps against the ground. Aderyn stares at it. She is _not_ moving that thing. “For the love of...SAM, can you ask Drack to move this thing back to the cargo bay?”

_“Already requested Pathfinder.”_

“Fantastic, thanks SAM.” Aderyn waves at the glowing blue orb on her desk and steps over the sleeping drone, heading straight out the door. She needs more coffee to handle whatever game Peebee has concocted. Though her current mug is likely broken. She sighs, entering into the kitchen. Her hands pass over the cupboards until she finds the one that holds the drink containers. Her fingers latch around the handle of an obnoxiously magenta mug with a tiny flying starship printed on the side.  

Peebee has a strange taste in dishware but Aderyn is happy to use it as replacement for hers. It’s the least the asari can do for her. She sets the mug into the machine and pushes a button to brew. There is still some coffee mix left inside from her previous trip.

As the drink filters, a beep emits from the machine, one similar to the sound Zap made. Aderyn stiffens, mind on high alert. “Oh please, don’t be—”

_“Surprise! You found the first clue, pretty obvious, but you’re pretty predictable that way.”_

“Damnit Peebee!” Aderyn curses loud enough for Liam’s head to pop out from the crew quarters down the hall.

_“You are addicted to this stuff. It’s like your clutch and you can’t do anything without it. Makes me too wired, can’t think straight. But for you? It lets you conquer the universe and then some. But I like this machine for the hot chocolate. You always have a mug ready for me when I’m working late and you can’t sleep. You always listen, even when you shouldn’t be. I’ve never really had that before. Thanks for it….Soooo next clue, where did you sketch me? Later.”_

The last of the coffee drips into the mug and the recording finishes. Aderyn glances at the mug, fingers twitching at her side. She takes it. Her face feels warmer than before. The words are hard for her to process. Peebee appreciates the hot chocolate she makes? Aderyn walks out into the hallway and heads directly for the meeting room. She can hear Liam laughing when she passes by, but she ignores it.

Aderyn liked to visit Peebee when the Tempest shifts to its night cycle. Most of the crew heads off to their own corners, either to sleep or find some respite from the day’s trials. Kallo is the one exception, steering the ship every available hour. Salarians can sleep an hour and work the rest of the twenty-three. She envies that.

But Peebe uses the time to tinker away on rem-tech and find new advancements through them. Aderyn just keeps to the side, watching, listening, just being present. It’s all Peebee needs to help work through the hard parts. Aderyn could listen for hours, content with never needing to interrupt. Peebee can hold a conversation for both of them, but in more recent weeks, she’s included Aderyn in them. It’s different, but welcome.

* * *

A datapad, one that belongs to Lexi as it is red unlike the others onboard, is left on the rounded seating for Aderyn. Her coffee is halfway done when she reached the third deck of the ship. Peebee’s game is working her nerves into overdrive. Her cheeks are partially flushed, but she keeps her thoughts light.

The purple mug is left on the table while Aderyn sits on the cushions. She crosses her legs and leans forward, datapad settled in the space between her knees. Her pushes a few keys and a play button appears. She presses it. The screen flashes to life and Peebee’s face comes into view. Her olive eyes are first, surrounded by the black streak, and then her face becomes the focus as she steps away from the screen.

 _“Hey again. Another pretty obvious clue, right? Well I’m not really one for playing secrets. Vetra’s better at it. Straight to the point is for me. Which, uh, brings me to this. I saw you that night, when you thought I was sleeping.”_ Peebee steps further back in the vid, picking at the side of her jacket. Aderyn thinks for a moment and her hand passes over her lips, the kiss rushing forward. Her face flushes red.

The asari looks up at the camera and smiles. _“Thanks for fixing my pillow, it was bugging me. Can’t sleep with those fluffy feathered things. Too soft, I like them lumpy. You always do so much for me, for everyone.”_

“Oh geez,” Aderyn mumbles and lowers her head in embarrassment.

 _“But that’s not really what this is about. I saw other things to. Those things weren’t bad, I liked them. You don’t have to be ashamed of it. We’re adults, we can make decisions we both like. You just need more time, seems like.”_ Peebee’s finger points at the screen, followed by a smirk. Aderyn feels like both are directly staring at her.

 _“I want...tell you what. Find the last clue, then you’ll know what I want. Just hope you want the same. Head to my space, you’ll see it.”_ The vid ends with a click and all that remains is a blank screen. Aderyn sets it down beside her. She can’t process any of it. Her hands rub her neck, skin warm under her palms. She doesn’t understand Peebee at all some days. She wants what? The last time this discussion was brought up, the asari pushed forward she was ‘no strings’ and that was that.

Aderyn would never push it. She wants strings and all, but it isn’t what Peebee wants. She respects that, respects her too much to make her someone she isn’t. She knows the crap that her ‘friend’ put her through and doesn’t want Peebee to feel that trapped again.

Aderyn gets off the couch. There has to be some reason for all of this, and she’ll find it.

* * *

Poc hovers in the empty space of where the former escape pod was once held. It is currently buried somewhere beneath lava and molten rock. Aderyn gazes at the drone with slight confusion. Peebee called her up, but is nowhere to be found. Only a workspace full of broken tech and a floating repurposed drone is all that greets her.

She wants to ask SAM to locate the missing asari, but holds back. Peebee meant for something to occur here but Aderyn has yet to find it.

It might be easier if she attempts to do as Peebee would. Her feet tread over familiar steps created by the area’s occupant. She finds a few things out of place; the toolkit is tossed aside instead of remaining in close range to Poc and the table, the pile of discarded tech is organized, which is rare, and Poc is not in her usual corner. That’s what bothers her.

Aderyn approaches the drone and it flashes green in her presence. She has no idea what that means. It makes her step back in fear of a shock. Zap flashes before it strikes an enemy with a beam of focused electricity.

But Poc only flashes again. It is awaiting some input or command, like Zap. Aderyn extends her hand and the scanner forms on reaction. The usual data is presented to her, but something new sticks out. A file designated _For Ryder_ pulls up in the list of available prompts. This is curious.

Aderyn looks up at Poc and back to the scanner. Peebee keeps her secrets close, not ready to spill with a presented command. Something is stirring in that asari’s mind, but she can’t say what.

Against her better judgement, and SAM’s, Aderyn taps the file name. Her screen dematerializes in a blink. Poc flashes again, green shifting over to orange and back again. It settles on a more vibrant green than common.

“What did she do to you?” Aderyn mutters with visible fear. Poc doesn’t respond, the drone never does, and a voice starts to crackle through its speaker. The green lights brighten and dull in response to the vocal level presented in the recording.

_“Right so, I’m not good at this, the speaking thing. Well I mean I am, but not when it comes to you. You do something to me Ryder and usually I would run from this feeling. But with you, I feel like staying. I love it. I don’t know what this it, but well, I love you. I think. This is all new. I want to see what this can be. That’s what I want, so if you feel the same leave a message. Beeeeeeep.”_

There is a long silence that lingers in the air after the message has played. Aderyn stares at the drone, eyes wide and focused on the green lights. She lowers her hand, slowly, and closes her eyes. That is…quite unexpected. Her cheeks flush, deeper than possible for a human. Her ears do too, red tips and all. She covers her face with her hands and resists the urge to scream.

How did this all even come about? Poc still floats, waiting for some response from her. After a moment, a long one that makes the message start to repeat, Aderyn smacks her hand against Poc’s head.

“Dammit Peebee. You always surprise me…I just. Yes, okay? Yes, I do,” Aderyn fumbles in the words, her voice pitching higher and higher until all that remains is a squeak. Poc beeps happily, message sent.

The fifth time it happens, Aderyn isn’t the one to say it, but Peebee is.


End file.
